The Power of Choice

Warning: This is a self-therapy post, so if you’re busy enough with your own therapy sessions, do not read this…

Before I begin with my amateur philosophy, let me tell you that I’ve been running on empty for the last couple of weeks. It just kinda crept up on me – “all of a sudden” there was nothing left in the tank. I went from energizer bunny to being constantly tired and from Miss Positive to complaining that I’m tired all the time. At first I didn’t understand it, didn’t know why I have no motivation, no drive, no fun. All that is not like myself, it’s someone I don’t know. But it can really be easily explained. Starting in April 2011, I went from hero to zero, then to 0.5 – From working out twice a day as a pro baller to not being able to walk for five months to spending 12 hours a day sitting at some desk. That alone should be enough to knock me off my feet. On top of that I recently changed my environment completely, going from a 9 million mega city to a 10,000 souls small town, from being an independent new yorker to spending  a 3 month vacation at hotel Mom. I lost the last bit of muscles that I had, I feel flabby, my skin looks like I’m going through puberty all over again.

Ok, so now you may understand why this self-therapy session was necessary. All that stuff I just talked about happens. Shit happens. But here are the good news: every pile of shit can be cleaned up. And my pile really isn’t that big. It’s up to me to scoop it up and wipe the floor. It’s up to me to make time to work out, it’s up to me to eat well, to laugh, to be thankful. I have the choice to replace a negative thought with a positive thought. Let me give you some examples:

Thought A: I miss my life as a basketball “star”. This shit sucks!
Thought B: I’m lucky that basketball took me around the world and led me to most of the people and things that are most valuable to me. Life is good.

Thought A: I’m flabby. I don’t have energy to work out. My biceps is gone.
Thought B: Let me get up and do some yoga, it only takes 30 minutes.

Thought A: I hate being financially dependent on my parents!
Thought B: I’m so happy that I still have both my parents.

Thought A: I miss New York!!!
Thought B: It’s so good to get some fresh country air!

I could go on forever but I think you got the drift. It’s so easy to feel powerless, to worry and to complain about what’s wrong with our lives. But it’s even easier to be powerful, to choose, to do something good for yourself every day, to be grateful. Life is not a punishment, it’s a gift. It’s beautiful and the ups and downs keep it interesting. Shit happens but we have the choice to clean it up right away so that the pile won’t get too big.

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9 Responses to The Power of Choice

  1. Fernando says:

    Thanks for sharing this… I had bad moments last week… and reading your blog help me change my perspective… there is the positive side and the opportunities even in the bad moments and have to clean the mess… Have a great week…

  2. Tasha says:

    Good stuff. Miss Positivity did not go any where, you just decided not to listen 🙂

  3. Thisboysmind says:

    Your amateur philosophy reminds me of the one of the techniques of Stoicism.
    I’m currently starting to read the book (then again it’s on my kindle so I’m currently starting 20 books).

    As for why you felt drained, I studied amateur psychology in Vienna und I place ze blame sqvarly on YOU!
    For the past month or more you’ve just been writing about all the cool places you’ve been to and the ones you want to go to and all the Gouda pizza with maple on top you wanna eat and this has created a dissonance with your current condition of being cooped up in your little town.
    So I prescribe a nice vacation of no less than a week and one viewing of The Shawshank Redemption.

    • Ok, who are you?? I’m always starting 20 books at the same time on my kindle and the Shawshank Redemption is one of my alltime favorites…
      I would love to fill that prescription but the schedule and wallet are tight right now. However, my Yoga DVD and light literature on my kindle have proven to be great medicine… 🙂

  4. Thisboysmind says:

    Actually that’s not such a huge coincidence.
    Shawshank is number one on IMDB for a reason and that damn kindle makes books easily accessible but tends to make us feel less committed to the books we start reading.

    I’m certainly glad you like the Shawshank Redemption; but I’m actually pissed off you own a kindle.
    It means I can’t offer to carry your books to school 🙂

    And to answer your first question.

    • Well, nice to meet you Hedonismbot 🙂
      Don’t worry, I still have enough books you can carry to school for me, I’m an independent woman and all but I wouldn’t say no to that offer!

      • Thisboysmind says:

        Just fill in the details: name of book/ISBN/weight/distance to be carried, then send it to me in a standard 4053/R form (the R stands for romance).

        I picked Hedonismbot simply because I really like the character, but now when thinking about it maybe it has a deeper psychological meaning.

        He is an extremely unlikely combination of a calculating machine that’s also programmed to seek unashamed pleasure, and I also have several character traits that don’t usually go together.
        Either that or I’m over-analyzing it.
        One way you can tell us apart is that he’s much richer and I do apologize.

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