I’m having a breakdown. No, I’m not drinking coffee and I’m not eating chocolate but I might do that tomorrow. It’s more like a mental breakdown. This diet works! But it is taking me over and taking my focus away from school. It’s not that my brain can’t function but I spend more time thinking about eliminating sodium and sugar than about my schoolwork. I thought I was giving the right type of support by doing it with Margie but in reality I can’t support anything if I don’t take care of myself first. I do not need to lose any weight. What I want back is the body that I had a year and a half ago, when my quads popped out, my arms were cut and my stomach flat. But that was not the result of a strict diet, it was the result of yes, eating healthy, but mainly working out daily, which I got paid to do. That body is not going to come back while I’m in grad school and working 20 hours a week. It’s just not. Acceptance is a powerful thing so I’m accepting it. I am now a brain athlete and I will use my writing skills to show off my sister, who is starting this journey that I know will take her far. I will support her but in a different way – with the positive energy that I can only bring out when I give my body what it needs.
Margie is a true warrior. We ran 6.6 miles today. She never enjoyed running but I think she’s starting to enjoy it now. Not only because she realizes that it actually does have a positive effect on her body but also because she now sees how beautiful a riverside can be – especially while jogging along it. *City kid gone nature lover* … 🙂 Margie has and always had the can’t stop, won’t stop in her veins. She pushes herself to the limit, and she is dedicated to being the best that she can be but always has her team in mind. She should have been every basketball coach’s dream and it’s unfortunate that at the deciding time she wasn’t. That’s why she’s not hoopin’ overseas right now, because one coach didn’t see in her what I see every day – especially every day of this mission. It makes me so happy to see that she found something to be passionate about again and fill that gap that basketball left in her heart. Margie is a special one and I guess I have to thank that coach for not only bringing us together in the first place but for also making sure that we are here together now. I cannot wait to see where this journey takes her. Day 5 is done and she seems more focused than ever. Tomorrow I will get up and boil her eggs and possibly have a cup of coffee after and continue working on my paper. We will both do what we have to do. Margie will shine very soon. It is her time to step into the spotlight. And I’ll be right here cheering her on and telling her story.